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Post by Darc Abyss on Oct 7, 2007 11:12:24 GMT 2
Well, mine are mostly original, and haven't been repeated. I'll make one for this post. Chuck Norris said you've had enough. And when he says something, you better listen.
Chuck Norris takes baths in the most acidic acid in the galaxy, and when he farts, he makes the cure for death.
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Post by Albireo on Oct 7, 2007 13:33:45 GMT 2
Yea yours are original...
Wanna know why we dont find alien life out there? Its cos Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked them all to death
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Post by Miguel on Oct 7, 2007 18:25:04 GMT 2
Chuck Norris is currentlly sueing NBC for copyright infringing on the trade marked names of his left and right legs, Law & Order.
Chuck Norris is the ultimate alchemist. He can turn anything into anything else by shouting at it, and whatever he's transforming turns into what he told it to out of fear.
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Sorrum
Robot Master
Dropping in to say hi
Posts: 462
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Post by Sorrum on Oct 7, 2007 18:59:13 GMT 2
Chuck Norris's sweat is the best aphrodesiac in the world. Too bad he never sweats....seriously.
Chuck Norris doesn't wait for time, Time waits for Chuck Norris.
Once, Chuck Norris was interviewed about what he would do if he couldn't roundhouse kick people anymore. Chuck Norris killed everyone in the area, because no one tells Chuck Norris what he can't do.
Superman is actually an ordinary human that Chuck Norris has breathed on.
When Chuck Norris wants to travel, he simply shouts "TRAVEL" and the world brings him to wherever he wants instantly out of fear.
Chuck Norris used to play soccer with aliens, until he kicked the ball into space. That ball is now Jupiter.
Chuck Norris can go through a black hole and come back.
The universe continually expands itself because of it's fear of Chuck Norris killing it.
Chuck Norris was going to be in a video game, but they couldn't think of anything that Chuck Norris wouldn't be able to kill just by looking at it.
One day, 90% of the animals on earth became extinct because they killed themselves. Chuck norris was born, on this day.
After seeing the "Ultimate Showdown" video, Chuck Norris proved he was undefeatable, by killing the earth.
There used to be a huge planet called Yoma in the milkyway galaxy. When Chuck Norris was born, it ripped itself apart into 8 smaller planets. These are now Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune.
Chuck Norris has killed 500 people with a single blink of an eye.
Chuck Norris's gaze can pierce diamonds, and he can tear a phone book in half with his eye lashes.
Earthquakes are caused when Chuck Norris kicks someone REALLY high up in the air.
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Post by Silver Stryker on Oct 7, 2007 20:09:43 GMT 2
*fixed*
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Post by Miguel on Oct 7, 2007 21:50:31 GMT 2
Some people say "time waits for no man. Not even Chuck Norris. Since Chuck Norris isn't a man.". This is untrue. Chuck Norris is all man.
Chuck Norris can kill you just by thinking about you.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if Chuck Norris told it to? All of it.
Chuck Norris has threatened to kill the whole damn internet and everyone on it if he reads one more goddmaned Chuck Norris fact.
If you kick Chuck Norris in the plvice, it doesn't hurt him. Because you can't hurt steel. And Chuck Norris' pelvice is Chuck Norris times stronger then steel.
Chuck Norris can count to ininity.
The reason babies cry when they are born is because they know they have just entered a world with Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris' t35t1cl35 do not bear hair on them, because hair does not grow on steel.
Chuck Norris discovered the ice cube.
Chuck Norris does not have heart attacks, Chuck Norris' heart has Chuck Norris attacks.
If on your SAT's, you right "Chuck Norris" for every answer, your score will be OVER NINE THOUSAND!!!!!
Chuck Norris once beat the crap out of 50 super ninjas. While having sex with three women.
The only thing we have to fear is, fear itself. And Chuck Norris.
Brokeback mountain is what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninja corpses in his backyard.
Chuck Norris can make a corpse come back to life by yelling "STOP BEING DEAD!!!" at it.
The reason lightning doesn't strike twice is because it owes Chuck Norris two hundred dollars.
Chuck Norris allowed people like Paris Hilton, Justin Timberlake, and Michael Jackson to exist because he felt like making people suffer.
What would Chuck Norris do for a Klondike Bar? Kill whoever the hell is stupid enough to ask.
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Post by Albireo on Oct 8, 2007 2:42:14 GMT 2
Oh this is so funny...
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Post by Miguel on Oct 8, 2007 23:24:53 GMT 2
Please, stop posting here just to say that the facts are funny. Unless you're posting a fact, I must ask you not to post.
Chuck Norris invented the Avada Kadavra curse.
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Post by Darc Abyss on Oct 9, 2007 0:02:13 GMT 2
Harry Norris Facts now?
Chuck Norris pisses the Felix Faustus potion, the one that give you the best luck in the world.
Chuck Norris has proven to Fluffy that Chuck Norris is the alpha dog.
Chuck Norris isn't a werewolf, but eats steaks raw anyway. He's that awesome.
If Chuck Norris were to become a wizard, his wand would be the size of a 400 year old Redwood tree. And he can still fit it in his pocket.
Voldemort calls Chuck Norris "You-know-who."
When you drink a Polyjuice Potion with hair from Chuck Norris, your head comes off. Chuck Norris doesn't like his hair being taken.
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Post by Miguel on Oct 9, 2007 1:00:51 GMT 2
No, just regular Chuck Norris facts. It's just that I came up with that one on my own.
Some speculate that the fourth Hokage is Naruto's father. What Masashi isn't going to tell you, is that it's true, but the fourthe's real father is Chuck Norris.
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Post by viruszero on Oct 9, 2007 1:39:23 GMT 2
There are 2000 thousand objects in the average room, Chuck Norris can kill you with all of them, including the room itself.
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Post by Albireo on Oct 9, 2007 1:41:14 GMT 2
When the sun goes nova, Chuck Norris can tell it not to and explode in the other direction, and then tell the world not to die because the sun's gone.
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Post by Silver Stryker on Oct 9, 2007 4:10:05 GMT 2
The ones I stated are of my own origin as well, just so you know.
- When Chuck Norris deems you dead, you're dead. when he deems himself dead, thousands of women fall to his every whim...
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Post by Albireo on Oct 9, 2007 4:17:59 GMT 2
When Chuck glares at someone, they just fall dead, not because of fear, its becuse Chuck has a death stare
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Post by Miguel on Oct 9, 2007 20:30:01 GMT 2
At one point, Chuck Norris had his own talk show. But it was cancelled due to the explosions of many television sets, geust stars, and the heads of viewers.
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer and his sweat can cause a corpse to return to life. To bad he never, EVER cries, or breaks into a sweat.
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