The Misadventure's a Deidara: Vol I, The workforce

[VileMKII]

I would like to enlighten the wonderful members that are apart of FZB on what I have been dealing with the past few days which great elaborate my absence. As some of you know through MSN chit-chat or by random posts I make, I do in fact work in a fast food joint known as Whataburger. I am not joking that is really the pitiful name of the overwhelming restaurant. It really makes me say "What a burger?" Because the concoction can barely be considered edible. However the problem here lies not within the grotess food itself but in fact the employee's. I have taken notice that the manager hires people who by simply looking at them you know they deserve to be thrown into a broom closet and locked there for eternity. ( Mantis made the reference for these type of people, if you recall ) But my outstanding story starts with a delightful being who had a massive ego.

Now, to describe this person who I have had my many issues with is truly challenging. I could say that he is nothing more than a sack of sh!t, but that still leaves a most blank image in the majority's mind. To start this lovely individual off he's obviously overweight, and I don't mean a lightly amount, it to the point that he can barely fit in-between the table and the chair at the dining lobby. Sad I know. He has no neck that I know of, honestly its been absorbed by the nasty globs of access skin that surrounds him. Most disturbing. His face is truly on par with that of Quasi Moto's, I don't care if I spelled that right but to simplify it, the hunchback of noterdom. He's 28 (ten years above me) and married. Please keep those two things in mind if nothing else. Because I think its legal issues I shouldn't put his name down but I don't care, we'll call him Frank.

You see, Frank is a noob to this building in which I work, he's only been here for about three weeks and his own selfish ego has him thinking he's a manager who has that oh-so powerful ability to boss everyone around. It's not a vary jokey thing either, because he likes to sit around and do absolutely nothing yet he commands that everyone run around like headless chickens and clean clean and guess what? CLEAN! But because most of us who don't get weeded out though random drug testing are above the standard American's mind (and thats not saying much) we know that he's just a selfish moron, and do our best to ignore this fat f***. He also has this inability to hold back remarks that are offensive and hypocritical. How this person is not fired I will never know. You see he claims to clean all the time and that whenever he's doing a job its flawless. But, if that were the case then I would love to know how when I took over the grill station for him the grill itself with burnt black, when cleaned it should be gray, the bun toaster was compiled with inserated crumbs, and I had no meat in my cooler, as well as zero...
bacon
sausage
eggs
veggies
buns
bags
salt seasoning
and just about everything else that you could possibly think I would use on a grill. But he swore up and down that he did in fact clean everything.

ICALLBULLSHITS!!

The night progressed though, and oh so greatly it went. We have to wear certain shirts, and I have the list in my handbook of nonsense to prove it. But in his mind we can only wear one shirt to work, and we have to have it cleaned EVERYDAY. This meaning that I would have to go to a laundry mat just to go to work to satisfy his happy fat-. In case you don't go to a laundry mat, they are a bit price to be going everyday. But I wear multiple shirts, each one different and each one approved by the almighty corporate fatheads, yet his self yells and complains on a daily bases about these. So yesterday he shot on my friend about this, and after hearing it for the past week about every hour you have a tendency to get rather annoyed. Because my friend is a passivest and hates any conflict, I stepped in on this. With a reply telling him that it doesn't matter what shirt he wears the one he has is legal. This hideous person who I sware needs to have a box over his face, because a bag is just not powerful enough to do the job, and states the fallowing.
"I have (name of head corporate manager)'s number and I talk to him every day, so i know what's-" and that was where I cut him off. He has this mind set that if he has someones number he has power. Such a pitiful comment set off Deidara clay reserve. katsu. It was time to through that back in his face with a nasty outcome. I replied with the most smart alack thing I can think off.
"OKay man I get it, so you suck (need I say more?)"
Now this was where things turned from annoying to funny. You see his eyes lit up with what I thought was rage, but it was most likely shock that someone had found out his little secret. He points at me and cries out.
"Your the one who sucks *bleep* you little fagot."
Bingo, I found his weakness. He is a homophobe, something that I just fail to understand. What makes gay people so off putting? I mean its not like their someone who is going to be infested with cooties. However I chose to play along with this, because this guy has had something along these lines coming his way.
"Okay, so I'm bisexual, what of it?" Was my reply. Now this one brought forth reasons to get him fired, which I'm am truly amazed he was not expelled from that joint on the spot. From then on he just kept repeating a sentence about me doing an action I don't, but I guess it made him feel better about himself. He then turned the tide, and pointed at me saying that I had better watch myself and stay out of his way because he was going to kick my, ya. Now remember those two quality's I asked you to remember? He's 28, and married, yet he's acting like a low life teenager. I told him to bring it, because I don't really care. So he moves in. Dumbest thing he could have done. You see, hitting or promoting violence in any manner is immediate grounds for being booted. But to his dismiss, mine as well, the manager stepped in and held him back. Sad. He then was placed on the opposite side of the store, oh like that would do any good.

So the issues was resolved, or so it had seemed. I was back making orders on my grill and his raging self came marching over saying that back in his day they use to beat up people for being like me. Once more he came at me, which was stupid because the manager was right there, and I had to hot metal spatula's in my hands, and I would not be afraid to brand him.

BRING IT ON!

I guess that feeble obviously not thought out plan of his was enough for him. Because after that he stayed away from him, and continued his even more disturbing actions than discrimination. He was flirting with all the female workers, and all the females in drive. (Drive is Drive-thru) Now, he's married, and 28, but he's hitting on 16 and older chicks. To me that morbid. I mean the fugly dickless child is married, so did his vows mean nothing to him, or is that ring on his left hand just for show? I was about to throw biblical curses at him, but I thought that would be better for a later date. After all, if i want him gone I need to flare him every day.

So I kinda have to ask the members. Am I to just take this guy out, or should I just play the cards of getting him fired. I can see the pro's and con's for each.

[randomdrifter865]

I am so sorry you have to deal with porkins the fiend of all that is ego... Sheesh sounds like you and him are going to have a blast and when I mean have a blast. I mean chances are he going to get buried in the lard pool he spawned from. I can relate in some level to an extent if I ever saw a person the fits the calibur it be one dude I know and the only difference is he is skinny. Well not to a job extent ,but the person I'm talking about may very well get a long with Porkins in a house on fire surrounded by howling wolves waiting to lunch on what remains of the both of them after their skirmish. Well I hope the dude gets fired ,but sounds like it the guy has his own problems and he's just bating you to do something stupid. So don't let him. Let him blow his steam and will see how it plays out if he has any future at all.

[Silver Stryker]

I say blow his fat-arse up. I say blast him like ya did Gaara, Dei-Dei San!

Not if the job is of any importance to ya though. lol. I can't say I had any similar problems so I can't really relate to you on the subject. If I were in your shoes, I would've done just about everything you did. At this point, I would egg him onto fighting me so I can:

1. kick his arse in the (semi) false name of self-defense.
2. get him fired.
3. jump him and kick his arse again after work.

but that's just me.

Good luck. And may the force be--.....yeah, good luck ^_^;

[Deathtanz Mantisk]

Sounds like the kind of douche who's had many years to hone his douchedom into the point wherein it is borderline unrivaled. Beware. Such powers are not to be trifled with.

My advice? Bite the back of his neck viciously, run away screaming, rob the nearest grocery store, take all the dry goods, barricade yourself in your basement, equip a suit of tin foil, crank call 911, construct companions for yourself out of fingernails (not necessarily your own fingernails), turn off all the lights, and remain down there developing plans of world domination until it's remotely safe to return to the civilization. Which is never.

Was he employed there before you? Some of the ego could be understood as a form of elitism if that's the case. :X

[VileMKII]

You see, Frank is a noob to this building in which I work, he's only been here for about three weeks

I've been there for a good year or so. He was just hired, so his pathtic self just needs to be squashed. He's just lucky he dosn't order food on his break, becuse I would be the one makeing it 'extra special'.

[randomdrifter865]

Gee I wonder what you would do to make it extra specail? Nevermind don't answer that question. I just had some real distubing thoughts of what one can do to make things specail.... Ugh....

[viruszero]

Extra special... as in loaded with exlax? (Former tablet form of course.) Guaranteed to provide amusement and revenge in the same swoop.

Well, continue forth as best you can. Speak to the higher ups about his attitude and whatnot. They may not appreciate the things he's been saying and doing. (And the more reports of these activities they get, the more likely they are to fire him.) I mean if he was just hired he should be on a probationary stay so any screw ups would land him with the pink slip.

Though when you speak to the higher ups you may want to encourage others to do so as well because the more voices speaking out against him the better. It's not as if they are blind to what is going on there... And no doubt they are as annoyed with his attitude as you are.

[Sorrum]

Kill him and serve the body up for lunch.

Hey, McDonalds serves us dead fat cows too.

[Chaos Tank]

Talk with your boss about his attitude. It sounds like he's lude, offensive and contributes nothing to the place. You've been there for awhile, maybe your boss will hear you out.

I'd say fighting is out unless it came to self defense. You could try and get his home number, let his wife know that he hits on other girls. But don't do anything that could land you in trouble, this guy isn't worth it.

[randomdrifter865]

All he is some douchbag who thinks hes better than everyone because he is older, has a big ego to go with the fat bod which probably suits him quite well and he's one terrible flurt to top it off. Well he's 28 and works at a fast food restaurant which hints to how much of an F ing loser he already is. He is probably more of a loser than anything else anyways and is trying to do become top dog because his life sucks super hardcore.

[VileMKII]

Well you see, my ex manager who now works a near-by tacobell has been calling in and compaining on him. her first one has been that she over heard him yelling fagot at people. Next up, because he hates women in charge, is going to be how she was in drive-thru and he had his little headset on lock and she overheard the entire thing of him curseing out a manager. Next she's goign to use her girlfirends to call in and complain about him flirting with them.

We have a plan to get him gone, its just going to take a few days.

[randomdrifter865]

His behavior will be his downfall then. He had it coming eventually right?

[Fefnir]

Ah haha haahahahahahaha!! That deserved more than an lol

I believe you're aware of the utility of a broomhandle, if you catch my drift...